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by transboysora



Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Angst, M/M, Minor Character Death, Trans Character, Trans Jaskier | Dandelion, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-10
Updated: 2020-02-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:54:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22649749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transboysora/pseuds/transboysora
Summary: For all Geralt knows of dead family, the situation is foreign to him.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 7
Kudos: 192





	Home

One day, a few years after Jaskier starts tagging along with Geralt, word comes of a beast spotted in the ruins of a recently ransacked and ravaged village.

Jaskier doesn't even hear the name of the place, doesn't have to when every time he blinks the familiar landscape as they approach seems to shift to match his childhood memories (there used to be a tree here, there used to be a patch of flowers that seemed to spread further every year, there used to be a young ~~girl~~ boy making wishes on dandelion fluff to just be seen.)

The first sign that something is wrong is that Jaskier is quiet for at least a half hour (no talking was rare, no humming was nearly unheard of) and Geralt gives him an inquisitive look that he pretends not to see as he pulls idly at a loose thread on his shirt.

The second sign something is wrong comes hours later. Jaskier remained silent the rest of the day and Geralt hadn't pushed (he wouldn't even know how, and for all he knows of dead family the situation is foreign to him; Jaskier holds far more feelings in his heart than Geralt would ever know what to do with, he wonders sometimes how the man can handle the obvious storm inside his head at all times and were he a more naturally empathetic man himself he'd have asked. But he's not. And he doesn't. And if Jaskier wanted to talk he'd just start rambling anyway, he reasons to himself.)

Geralt had not pushed but maybe it would be better if he had. Complain he may but the silence itches some part of him that he can't identify. Jaskier can tell it bothers him (sees his mouth open to start talking at least once an hour) and would laugh if he had it in him.

He has nothing in him except thoughts of willingly leaving home, thoughts of the younger siblings he was meant to take care of and parents that he abandoned, of childhood friends that never quite understood and of a home he would never see standing again.

He is, to put it mildly, a bit preoccupied. He doesn't make a sound until they're meant to be sleeping and even then the grief merely pulls softs sobs out of him, stifled at first and shaking his whole body later.

Geralt is awake. Jaskier knows and Geralt knows that _he_ knows but neither of them speak. What would he say? I'm sorry I dragged you through the charred remains of your home, I'm sorry I am not the best person to grieve with, I'm sorry I wasn't here to stop it, I'm sorry you had to find out. 

Jaskier would not take an apology.

Jaskier would not be able to deal with any guilt Geralt may have, not yet.

Jaskier needs something and he isn't sure what and he also isn't sure when it became such a big deal that he didn't know.

Comfort was not his game, gentle words and gentle touches did not come easily. There are not many times in his life he wishes they did. There are not many people he would try for.

(Jaskier, as it turns out, is one.)

**Author's Note:**

> hey follow me on tumblr @seacaster if you want
> 
> [here's the original post!](https://seacaster.tumblr.com/post/190645846194/one-day-a-few-years-after-jaskier-starts-tagging)
> 
> comments are always appreciated, as are reblogs on there!


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